Last week, our landlady abruptly announced that instead of renewing our lease as agreed, she had decided to sell our house of five years. We were unexpectedly thrown into the tumult of moving. As we searched for a home which would fit the unique needs of our family, it is not easy to find a wheelchair-friendly house that is also big family and homeschool friendly. We’ve looked off and on for the past two years, not finding anything suitable and in our price-range.
We were amazingly calm for generally emotional people. We began packing, and began praying. God would provide. We were certain of it.
Within days, it seemed that Divine Providence had provided us the perfect home for our family. The location, the price, everything was exactly as we would have hoped. We were elated, and drove the children by our “new home.” The packing and purging sped up, and we were all mentally decorating this seemingly perfect house.
Then yesterday the deal fell through. My husband and I were stunned at this latest turn of events. It had taken us so long to find even one that worked, how were we to find another within an ever-dwindling time frame?
This morning I found reassurance in the words of St Padre Pio who said “… stay in the boat in which our Lord has placed you, and let the storm come. You will not perish. It appears to you that Jesus is sleeping, but let it be so. Don’t you know that if he sleeps, his heart vigilantly watches over you? Let him sleep, but at the right time, he will awaken to restore your calm.”
In his words, I found the perfect description of where we are – in a storm tossed boat, fighting the motion sickness, and the turbulence, looking for safety and a place to rest from the battering of the waves. And in the midst of it all, Christ seems silent. We desperately crave His ability to calm the waves of chaos all around us. While He sleeps. The key is to get into the boat, and not jump ship.
It is a lesson in trust for us just as it was for the Disciples nearly 2,000 years ago. It seems as if the whole world is suddenly crashing in around us, and I want nothing more to cry out “Enough!” But I won’t. Instead I’ll follow the advice of St Benedict “Ora et Labora.” Pray and work.
Tomorrow morning we set out once again to search for the needle in the haystack with a prayer on our lips and the calm of Peter in the boat in our hearts.
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