This is my Brain on Skunks – Riparians at the Gate + Jennifer Fitz

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My friend shared this photo of two skunks visiting her parish:

Skunks always appear far closer than photographer desires.

My brain immediately started composing this addition to Marty Haugen’s contemporary classic:

Gather us in, the striped and the sneaky,

We’re coming in, so try to relax;

Be not afraid that we’ll make you stinky,

Avoid sudden movements and give us your snacks.

In fairness, my brain will also circle around and make some kind of connection to the readings, and evangelization, and how Jesus loves even troublemakers like you and me —  all that jazz.  But yes, for the rest of my life, this is the verse I’m going to hear in my head when Gather Us In starts up.

Thank you, skunks; thank you, brain; thank you, Mom and Dad for years of family camping trips so yes, I know just what the skunks want and no, reader, you shouldn’t have put that in your tent.  Tom Zampino, your spot as the Conspiracy’s top poet remains secure.



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What will you be doing on your death bed? In my February 2014 Death Bed Test Run, my answer amused me: I’d be writing about the Catholic faith. It’s what I do. In addition to my blogging habit . . . I’m the author of Classroom Management for Catechists. You can find me lurking around the Catholic Writers Guild. I homeschool my four kids. I have an MBA (accounting / finance), and my undergrad degree was in International Studies with a splash of economics thrown in. Studied for a year of that at the Institut d’Etudes Politique in Paris, so oui, j’aime all that French stuff. My latest educational frenzy? I’m training to be a presenter for Family Honor. I have an agreement with God that He gets to lay me flat whenever He wants, and I get to whap on the floor when He does it.

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