BREAKING! Detroit Trades Priest, Deacon to Chicago As Trading Deadline Looms

(AoftheANews) – DETROIT – With the Ordinary Season trading deadline fast approaching, the Archdioceses of Detroit and Chicago pulled off a huge trade, with Detroit sending All-Star priest Fr John Riccardo and Deacon Harold Singleton to the Windy City in exchange for two prospects and a seminarian to be named later.

Church pundits weren’t overly surprised by the trade, though most felt that Detroit didn’t get the best value for whom many consider to be Detroit’s most outstanding priest.

“Chicago got the better end of this deal,” one analyst told AoftheA News. “Riccardo is solid, dependable, and virtually tireless. He’ll save a lot of souls, and lead many to Jesus. Deacon Singleton is a powerful preacher, and is a great promoter of the Church. It’s too early to tell about the prospects Detroit got in return – they’re young, having been ordained this Spring – but on paper, it looks like Chicago came out ahead here.”

“Detroit’s not exactly in rebuild mode,” another analyst said, “but they were struggling to meet Riccardo’s contract, and he’s due an extension. Plus, Chicago clearly needed a boost in orthodoxy. They got that, in a huge way. Frankly, I’m surprised Cardinal Cupich agreed to this deal.”

A spokesman for the Chicago archdiocese told AoftheA News, speaking under the condition of anonymity, that Cardinal Cupich thought he was getting Ricky Ricardo, and jumped at the opportunity to land such a famous celebrity.

There were rumors that AOD tried to include Church Militant in the deal, but thus far they have been unsubstantiated.

In other trade news, the Archdiocese of New York nixed a potential deal with the Diocese of Peoria because Bishop Jenky kept insisting that the remains of Archbishop Fulton Sheen had to be included in any trade.

Image source: Andrew Jameson via Wikimedia Commons  [CC-BY-SA-3.0]

About Larry D

LarryD has been blogging since March 2008, making observations on trends within the culture and the Church. His goal? Poking hornets nests with a stick and injecting humor into the New Evangelization, with the gentle reminder that everyone's taking themselves way too seriously. He currently resides in Michigan.
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