Category Archives: Parish Report

PARISH REPORT: Church Teams Up with Door Dash to Bring Coffee and Donuts to Shut-ins

ACMPress – SAN FRANCISCO – Members of Our Lady of Hospitality parish, unable to make it to Sunday Mass obligation due to illness, injury, or any other reason, were happy to learn the parish council approved a partnership with DoorDash … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, News That Could Be True, Parish Report, Parody, Satire | Comments Off on PARISH REPORT: Church Teams Up with Door Dash to Bring Coffee and Donuts to Shut-ins

PARISH REPORT: Hipster Caught Adding Gift Tags to Parish ‘Giving Tree’, Asking for Beer

ACMPress – PORTLAND – Surveillance cameras at Our Lady of Unfailing Hops recorded a parishioner hanging his own gift tags onto the parish’s Giving Tree in the gathering space over a three day period during the first week of Advent. … Continue reading

Posted in Humor, News That Could Be True, Parish Report, Parody, Satire | Comments Off on PARISH REPORT: Hipster Caught Adding Gift Tags to Parish ‘Giving Tree’, Asking for Beer

PARISH REPORT: Church Unveils New Line of Craft Sacramental Wines

ACMPress – NAPA VALLEY – Sts. Bartle & Jaymes in Napa, CA unveiled their long awaited line-up of 2019 craft organic sacramental wines this past weekend, holding tastings for their parishioners after each Mass. The response was overwhelmingly positive. “I’m … Continue reading

Posted in All The News That's Misfit To Print, Humor, News That Could Be True, Parish Report, Parody, Satire | Comments Off on PARISH REPORT: Church Unveils New Line of Craft Sacramental Wines

PARISH REPORT: Church Serves Free Range Donuts at Coffee Hour; Attendance Skyrockets

ACMPress – LIBERTYVILLE – Mass attendance at Our Lady of Organic Goodness in downtown Libertyville has increased markedly since May of 2019, and the Welcoming and Holistic Ministry chairwoman knows the reason why. It’s the free-range donuts being served at … Continue reading

Posted in All The News That's Misfit To Print, Humor, News That Could Be True, Parish Report, Parody, Satire | Comments Off on PARISH REPORT: Church Serves Free Range Donuts at Coffee Hour; Attendance Skyrockets